Mar 27, 2011

Facebook Woes

Facebook.
What to say about Facebook?

Most of the time I love it. I love connecting with old friends. I love keeping tabs on my family and friends. I love hearing about their work, their good meals, their children, their happiness. I love keeping an eye on my pregnant friends. I love seeing pictures of Ashtin and her lovely family so happy in Hawaii. I love watching goofy videos that people post. I love spreading the word about the various nonprofits I have worked for. There are a lot of things that I love about Facebook.

That being said: I also really despise Facebook. I hate the self promoting. I hate the status updates that are pointless, too negative, too 13-year-old girl sounding, too telling (for the whole world to see), too political, too leading, too vague, etc. You know the posts.



I had a really negative experience with Facebook this week. It gave me one of the biggest anxiety attacks I have ever had. I lost my appetite. I was shaking I was so angry. I felt attacked unfairly. I felt provoked. I felt especially hurt because this was from a family member.

I won't go into the details but it has made me question whether or not I ever want to get back on Facebook.

It's no surprise to you all that I am very liberal. I am very political and very involved. I know I am far from perfect but I try really hard to phrase my status updates in a way that won't overly offend people that have different political beliefs than I do. I know I wasn't like this in the past but I feel like now I really try to make a conscious effort to screen what I post. I actually hide particular people from posts because I don't want to offend people I care deeply about. Did you guys know you can do that? Genius!

Most offensive posts I can let roll off me. Most of the time I just hide the friend with the offending posts and move on. However there have been a few posts lately that have really got me going. Gun rights, a post about being a mom/not being a mom and now a political/sexist post have just really irked me. I mean, irked me to the point that I have had to go back and forth about issues with people I don't event know. Posts that people start calling me names and accusing me of stuff that is totally out of line. I am not the person that can just ignore really offensive posts. Some posts just take it too far. I will call people out on their stuff if I think they are being unreasonable. However, I always look for a good debate. Not name calling, not Glenn Beck talking points, but a good debate. Look, if you have different views than me - great. Just back up what you feel. Don't call me names and yell at me for something you can't even verbalize. I have many family members and many dear friends that have very different beliefs than me. But I respect them so much because I know why they believe what they do. That's all I ask. Back up your beliefs. Back up your reasoning. I'll respect you 10xs more.



Due to this family member I have decided to take a month break from Facebook. I can't be emotionally wrapped up in something that was brought on by a mean spirited post. I can't lose sleep over it anymore. I just can't. Honestly, this is going to be a tough task for me. I was home sick with the flu all weekend and I had to make such an effort not to log onto Facebook and waste time. I know I'll be more productive at work and at home if I just stay away. I'm not sure if I will last but I am really going to try. I want to see if I can remember what it is like to live in a world where I don't have to hear what Timms ate for lunch, or what 'the punk' said, or what song is making Jon cry today (ha- I love you all). I think I'll be ok.

I do ask that you text me, call me or email me this month. I will miss that connection. I'll also miss updating you all about my first KUER fund drive. It'll be a fun 10 days and my first real shot at being live on the radio. I'll miss keeping you updated about what I think is important. But I know you won't miss it. I mean really, Facebook is not the most meaningful communication. Still, I love/hate it.

7 comments:

  1. Hey friend, I'm sorry you were sick with the flu. And that you're sick of Facebook. I always feel like I must be a loser... missing out on my friends lives because I never get on Facebook. Can't live with it, can't live without it, I guess.
    Loves to you, girl.

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  2. So lame. I hate when people get like that. A few weeks ago, someone posted something negative about pitbulls and it turned into a pitbull bash fest. I wanted to comment with some counterpoints (owning two pitbull mixes myself), but I knew it would just turn into a huge mess of accusations and name calling (it seems like it always does). Sorry you had such a bad experience :(

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  3. Boo to inconsiderate people! Incidentally, today I took Timms' job and posted, not about the punk, but about my lunch: In N Out. Of course, I tagged Mariani.

    A FB break will be therapeutic. Good luck with it.

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  4. I'll update you on my lunch daily anyway. (do I really facebook post about food that much??? Why has no one called for an intervention!?!?!)

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  5. I'll miss seeing you around the FB. For me, it's boring, but I only post things on facebook that probably won't offend anyone. I don't usually jump into arguments or even discussions if I can help it. There are other places online where I can do that.

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  6. What a bummer. I'm so sorry. I understand how sometimes it's just not worth the aggravation! I will definitely blog about Kennedy (who is coming tomorrow, ahhh!) so keep an eye out. Love ya!

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