I Was So Wrong 2018

2018 has come and gone. I sat down intending to write an eloquent blog about overcoming so much in 2018 and how 2019 is going to be so much better. Yet as I flipped through pictures on my phone, I realized that 2018 wasn't all that bad. In fact, it was pretty damn good. Sure it had its really odd and hard times. I felt myself challenged and doubting myself more than I wish I had. But I came out the other side. Turns out I am really grateful for 2018. Here are some of my favorite moments.

January

In January my sister told me she was going to fly to Oklahoma City to help her son Parker propose to his girlfriend. He met his soon-to-be fiance on their mission. The two were taking a trip back to see the people that they met during their time there and he wanted to propose. January in Oklahoma City? Cold. So so cold. And he wanted to propose outside? Well....ok! My sister is a magic maker. She brought suitcases of supplies and had boxes more shipped to a friend there. And then we set about our business. We hung hundreds of lights, candles and lanterns in this remote park overlooking a pond. We spent 5 hours in the 12 degree weather setting up the PERFECT proposal sight. It was so fun to see these lovebirds get engaged. It was worth every frozen finger and toe.

February

Seth, Millie and I all have February birthdays. After nearly killing myself creating a magical My Little Pony birthday party for Millie, I decided I wanted to get out of town and go to away with Seth. For our birthday weekend went went to Zion. We spent three days in Springdale where we nearly froze (it was unseasonably cold) but hiked some amazing and uncrowded hikes. We ate a lot of great meals, stayed in an amazing hotel and just enjoyed time together. It was just what we needed.

March

I fell in love with the desert this year. Absolutely head-over-heels in love with the red rocks and the way they offer such a stark contrast to the bright blue sky. I loved the feel of the sun on my face when escaping the cold, smoggy air of Salt Lake City. I was mesmerized by the cacti blooming in the spring. The desert is my place. Luckily my job at KUER had me spending time in Southern Utah the first 5 months of the year. I spent several weekends there alone and absolutely felt refreshed by it. I need to go back.

April

At last the smog cleared, and Spring arrived. I didn't realize how amazing Spring was until I had kids that have been cooped up in the house all winter. Those early warm days are some of the best of the year. There is nothing better than sitting outside on a perfectly cool evening enjoying the blossoms.

April also turned out to be my last time on-air at KUER. I didn't know I was leaving at the time, but the fund drives were always a highlight of my time there. I still can't listen to the fund drives. It feels too weird to not be part of it anymore.

May

One word can sum-up May: Hamilton. After obsessing for months and months over this musical I finally saw it. In fact, I saw a lot of amazing theater in Salt Lake this year. Hamilton, Waitress, Come from Away, Sweeney Todd, etc. Hamilton was almost everything I wanted it to be (come on, couldn't we have cast a better Washington?) My friend Timms and I met the cast after, I rode Trax with Aaron Burr...sir. It was a great night.

In May we also took a vacation and found the beach. The bottom picture of Tilda with her binky is one of my favorites. We said goodbye for good to the binky after this trip. It was refreshing and wonderful to get away.

June

And just like that, it was Summer. The season I usually dread. But the summer gods smiled upon me and gave me owls and my love of summer was solidified. One evening in June I received a text from my neighbor saying "There is an owl in our backyards!" We went outside and saw a baby owl flying around. I was hooked. We soon discovered that we had an entire nest of Western Screech Owls in our back yard and it was pretty much the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. They turned a summer-hater into a summer-lover. I spent nearly every night for 7-8 weeks outside watching my owls. They weren't shy and I would often get within feet of them. I tried to make them love me. I talked to them. I offered them hotdogs...but before long....they flew the nest. I was devastated. But really, they were the greatest summer surprise.

My sister-in-law moved to a gated community just up the street. We spent many Sundays at the pool. Which, normally is not my thing. This year? LOVED it. The girls were happy to swim and swim. I was happy to sun and chat with my family. Pretty dreamy.

Finally, I said goodbye to KUER at the end of June...I already wrote extensively about my love of KUER. It was a hard place to say goodbye to.

July

Seth and I took another weekend jaunt together after I finished at KUER, and before I started my new job at United Way. We decided another weekend hiking was the best idea, and it was. We stayed at an amazing rental, a tiny cabin in Wyoming. We went into Jackson Hole for the day. We did puzzles while drinking wine and listening to records. And we hiked to the top of Table Rock in the Tetons. I nearly died. But it was beautiful. Oh and we spent hours listening to the podcast "My Dad Wrote A Porno." One of the highlights of the entire year was when Seth laughed so hard while we were listening that he nearly threw up. Listen people. Trust me.

I also started my new job at United Way of Salt Lake in July. This month was a blur. It was exhausting and overwhelming being the new girl at such a BIG place. But I eventually got my feet under me.

August

We rounded out summer in August with outdoor concerts, movies, swimming and barbecues. I actually had so many wonderful nights in August. WHO AM I!? Oh, apparently I'm a girl who finally loves summer. I found a way to live with the sweat. Summer may be hot, but I don't have to keep my girls entertained constantly. The doorbell rings early in the morning and neighborhood kids come wandering in with bedhead and pajamas and begin their hours of playing We don't rush to get kids off to school in the morning so mornings are far less stressful. Bedtime is stretched to accommodate swinging as the sun sets. We eat outside, play games outside, color outside. I would come home many nights to an army of kids riding bikes and scooters in our circle. I got to continue honing my greenish thumb. Summer is pretty great you guys. But lets not get carried away, nothing is better than Fall.

September

And just like that, my baby was off to preschool. The evenings cooled down. I started baking.

Sweet cinnamon pumpkin candles were lit 60% of the time in my home. Fall was coming. And I was sick as a dog for a couple weeks. The leaves began to change and it finally was cool. My season was here.

I wish I could describe how much I love autumn. It's just when I feel best and most alive. I move indoors and create a coziness in my home again. I feel focused and happy. It's the most beautiful time of year. Nothing beats it. The smells, the activities, the sights. It's all damn near perfect.

October

We were back to the desert in October for a family vacation. It was so needed after a few stressful months at a new job. Family vacations are starting to feel like actual vacations. Finally. I mean, it's not as refreshing as trips sans children, but we do get some time to sleep and rest. We had a great time with the Youkstetters. We always do.

Halloween is my favorite holiday. This year I didn't have my big Halloween party, which bummed me out. Last year I learned over and over again that I can't do everything. I had to simplify where I could. So I didn't have a party although it broke my heart. I did have some neighbors over for chili before heading out to trick-or-treat. The adults carried cocktails and the kids ran from house to house. It was ridiculously fun. I love this group of people. How did I get so lucky to move where I did?

November

November wasn't too eventful but I did get to spend time with these lovely ladies. Which made me realize how great 2018 was for friends. I don't think it's common to find a new group of friends in your late 30s but I have had so much fun with this amazing group. Some are old friends that I have reconnected with after 15 years. Others are brand new. But man I have had a great time and a great year thanks to these people.

I feel so lucky to have so many good friends. New friends, old friends, work friends, etc. I'm a lucky woman.

December

And then there was London. Seth surprised me in September. It was a particularly hard weekend. I was sick, the girls were sick and Seth was sick. I was cooped up and feeling depressed when he said, "How do you feel about going to London in December?" Well duh! This will have it's own blog post, but we went for 3 days and 3 nights to the greatest city in the world. He loved it like I love it. It was pure magic. More to come...it really deserves its own blog.

We rounded out 2018 with an overly packed Christmas. It was exhausting but so much fun. Our girls are just at the perfect ages. They had fun with the damn Elf on the Shelf every morning. We did all the typical holiday activities. We baked, we decorated, we went on the Polar Express, we drover through lights, we saw Santa, etc. I nearly exhausted myself trying to create memories for them.

It was all worth it on Christmas morning. It really was perfect. They were so happy, so excited and I was just filled with joy. I love being their mom.

I went into 2018 with high hopes for myself. I was going to lose those 20 pounds. I was going to get off my depression meds. I was going to find "me" again. It wasn't until I started gathering my thoughts for this blog that I realized I've always been here. It wasn't perfect but it really was a remarkable year. I changed jobs but survived. My marriage was rocky at times but we overcame the problems again and again. My family suffered through addiction issues but everyone is alive. We made it. We didn't just make it, it was a great year. I feel guilty for thinking it was so awful. It wasn't. It was great. Who cares about that 20 pounds...there is always 2019.